Pastor. What was once a highly esteemed position, given great respect and authority, has devolved into something that most people in our North American culture now struggle to trust. For the past 17 years I have spent all but six months on different college campuses — each with differing titles, but all with a […]
As the quieter months of the summer begin, how will you utilize the time and space that you have? More specifically, and less obvious, how will you engage the practice of silence? With much of the “noise” that makes up our normal days while our students are around during the academic year now removed […]
I’ve recently been reminded that all leadership is not equal. I’m sure we all know this — on one level. And yet, sometimes it’s not until we see first hand (or hear the laments or praises of someone who is experiencing something very different from what we are), that we are reminded that no, […]
This is one of a series of questions I ask every student during their interview for a leadership position. More often than not, they seem confused by the question. They usually respond with some derivative of “Wow, that’s a hard question” or “I am not really sure I have ever thought about it.”Even those who […]
“Know your strengths, vulnerabilities, and triggers.” Check. “Get used to uncertainty and conflict.” Double check. “Experiment beyond your comfort zone.” Um…really? If I already know it works… “Take care of yourself.” Yikes. I’m probably going to have to have a hard conversation with myself. About 15 months ago, I read these words under a heading […]
How does this fit with your own sense of calling? What about this do you struggle with?
My name is Guy — and I’m a recovering perfectionist.
It’s been approximately 12 years since my then new bride called me out on my condition — primarily because I was beginning to impose it on her, and our young marriage. (Thanks Hunny!)
It probably took me another year or two to fully understand and embrace my imperfect reality of constantly striving to be perfect — at which point I officially entered into unofficial recovery.
I began to consciously tell myself that it was OK to not be the best, to not be perfect in everything I said and did.
Many times in ministry, especially college ministry, you feel like you are walking alone. Just drifting along, trying to survive, and isolated from others in ministry.
College Ministry has been described as the Navy Seals of ministry — It’s very hard work and no one ever gives you credit when it goes well (plus, some people erroneously call us Youth Ministers, a pet peeve of mine).
I am surrounded by a great church staff, but they often fail to grasp what college ministry is or have the tools to push me in my goals and desires.
It’s the dreaded college triangle. If you choose a social life and sleep, you sacrifice good grades. If you choose good grades and sleep, you give up the social life. If you choose a social life and good grades, then you won’t be getting sleep anytime soon.
The moment I thought I had the college triangle figured out, I began my life as a youth and college minister while still in school. At the age of 22, I was a senior in college, engaged to my high school sweet heart, and began serving as the new youth and college director. My college triangle now turned into a rectangle. So what do I choose now? Social life? Good grades? Sleep? Or ministry? What would be sacrificed because of my decision? These very real questions began to haunt my everyday life.
Sometime around the age of 13 a friend entered my life. This individual intentionally chose me, though at the time I did not know it. His name was Bruce.
Bruce’s investment in my life seemed inconspicuous. He was, after all, the Youth Superintendent for the Friends churches in the Pacific Northwest. He was paid to do this!
Bruce and I began meeting regularly as I was just entering high school. It seemed to me he had the ability to discern one’s entire life story by simply looking them in the eye.
Growing up in a larger church, you would think that I could go through youth group picking the best mentors out there and entering college as the next Billy Graham.
That’s what everyone would think at least.
In reality, it was not until my freshmen year of high school that my Sunday School teacher and I began a relationship that changed my life forever. Harry Barber (yes, that’s his real name), who was my interim youth minister and incredible mentor, worked together with me every week for a year and a half as he taught me how to lead my peers at church. We did life together and I learned by watching his example.
The #iMentor Initiative was started to honor the investment of mentors all over the world, and to encourage potential mentors to take the initiative in starting an intentional relationship with a college student today.
Read my story here.